The future of the iPhone

The second coming of the iPhone is closing in upon us. Although Apple makes sure that as many people as possible are unaware until it's arrival, the iPhone 2 has been referenced to not only in the code of the new iPhone OS 3.0 software, but also in early versions of the upcoming Mac OS X Snow Leopard (Mac OS X 10.6).

So, what will Apple put in the new version of the Jesus phone?

Well, if I had to guess, I would say they are going to add:

1. Support for video recording (If they don't put it in this time I'm gonna punch Steve Jobs in the face).
2. A faster processor for smoother performance.
3. A more powerful graphics processing chip for more advanced and better looking games.
4. A thinner profile (yes it's possible).
5. Better battery performance.
6. More memory.

Those are the plausible additions. Now for the crazy one's, because what's life without dreaming big?

1. A removable battery (it's just not Apple's style, they'll probably never do this).
2. An SD memory expansion slot.
3. Flash for the camera.
4. A user-facing camera for video calling!
5. A set of huge speakers that spontaneously grow out of the sides of the phone!
6. An attachment that automatically cleans my toilet!
7. A pair of massive robotic arms that blow stuff up!!!
8. A super soaker attachment!

.... Sigh, a man can dream!! A man.... can dream...

Funny-Ass Video of the Week (7)

Today I have a very special Funny-Ass video of the week for all my loyal readers (especially those from Oklahoma!). This particular video is actually not a video at all, it's more of a short film. It's 30 minutes long, but it's definitely worth watching.

In fact, every time some one watches this short film, a penguin in Antarctica is saved from a lonely death like that one penguin in March of the Penguins...

The Old Man and the Seymour from The Old Man and the Seymour on Vimeo.

By the way, I recommend watching this in full screen and HD for the full effect. Enjoy!

My brother got his first Mac ever!!

Click the image above to enlarge and be able to read my brother's Facebook post of surrender!

My older brother got a Mac!! Sweeet victory!!! At last the evil tyranny of Microsoft will be overthrown foreverrrrrr!!!

.... er.... well.... not quite.

But, I'm a pretty big Mac head and the fact that my older, Mac-hating brother finally got one is a huge triumph for me. Especially after years of him calling them macintrash and crapintosh and severely making fun of my decision to get my family's first Mac two years ago.

*tear*

I'd just like to thank Steve Jobs for always being there for me. *snifle* and my friends for never really understanding the difference between Macs and PCs, and my mom for supporting me but not actually caring.

Thank you!!! I love you guys!!!

My first Vlog ever!!

I just uploaded my first vlog enjoy!

Here's a link to PhillyD's blog: www.phillyd.tv

He also has a youtube channel: www.youtube.com/sxephil

Funny-Ass Video of the Week (6)

Either I'm crazy or I just spent the last 15 minutes laughing at this (yes, I know, the video 7 is only minutes long).

In short, this is what happens when you try to translate Ying Yang into proper English.

Sometimes, you can't help but love the stuff MTV puts on the air.

Does iPhone OS 3.0 kill the Palm Pre?

I recently blogged about the new update to the iPhone operating system dubbed iPhone OS 3.0. And although there are some added features that should have been there from the beginning (*cough* Copy and Paste *cough*) there are also some relatively significant features that push the iPhone OS to the next level.

Now, I had to ask myself, does this put it on par with the upcoming Palm Pre? Obviously, I can talk about neither of them from personal experience, but I can talk about them in terms of their features and what I have seen of those features. And there is one huge feature that the iPhone still lacks compared to the Palm Pre, and that is multitasking. The ability to have multiple applications open at one time makes it infinitely easier and faster to get things done and makes the device much more useful. Not only that, but from what I have seen the Palm Pre seems to do this without sacrificing the speed and fluidity of the user interface. Another innovative feature of the Palm Pre that the iPhone lacks is Synergy, which is a fancy term they use to say that it brings together information you already have in all of your online accounts like Facebook and Gmail. The feature doesn't sound like much, but it looks like it will be surprisingly useful.

However, I will admit that Apple definitely included features that take it closer to the Pre, such as its search feature, and it's background notifications. Even with that, I still think the iPhone has a lot to do before it "kills" the threat posed by the Pre.

Jim Cramer drilled by John Stewart.... from Comedy Central

It is a testament to the deterioration of modern media when a talk show host from Comedy Central is the only one with the balls to really bring out the truth. Case and point: John Stewart of "The Daily Show with John Stewart" on Comedy Central recently interviewed Jim Cramer from "Mad Money" on CNBC.

John Stewart, clearly furious at the complete irresponsibility of CNBC, questioned Cramer on why the news channel didn't accurately report on the stock market situation. An especially shocking part of the interview uncovered a hedge fund Jim Cramer used to run and the illegal practices he may have used to gain profits from it.

John Stewart truly got down and dirty with it, which is just how it should be. Overall, it was truly an eye opener, especially considering it's a talk show on Comedy Central. More news channels should be like this.

Link to Video on ComedyCentral.com

Funny-Ass Video of the Week (5)

First of all, I just realized that "Funny Ass" should probably have a hyphen in it since it's pronounced as one word (kind of).
However, and I can't imagine why this is, but I couldn't find funny or ass in my AP Stylebook (sorry Prof. Ottolenghi).

Anyways, I found this hilarious video in which Jesus shows off his awesome pwnage powers!
It's made by comedy duo Luke Barats and Joe Bereta (known as Barats and Bereta), who also have some other great videos at baratsandbereta.com, their myspace channel, and their youtube channel.

Warning: If you are easily offended by videos that make references to religious subjects please put a banana suit on, find the nearest baseball bat, put peanut butter and jelly on it and wack yourself over the head with it. Thank you for your cooperation.

Apple adds revolutionary new iPhone features that every other phone has.

Today (about 10 minutes ago) Apple held a special press conference to announce all-new amazing features for everyone's favorite phone, the iPhone!

Apple added such breakthrough features as Multi Media Messaging (MMS a.k.a. picture messaging)....
wait... my RAZR had that four years ago....

right...well they also added cut and paste!!! It's totally revolutionary!!!!!...
Hey, hold on a second... didn't my old non-smart phone have that like 5 years ago?....

hmm.... Well hey!! Now you can forward text messages to people........ It's crazy!!!
I mean... nobody's ever done that before!! right??

sigh.... damnit

Funny Ass Video of the Week (4)

Hey everyone.
Man do I work hard for you guys. I had to fish this video out of an old archive from 2007!!
It's pretty hilarious though and it's part of a prank war series on collegehumor.com which features the insane pranks between Streeter Seidell and Amir Blumenfeld. The pranks are entirely real (which is pretty hard to believe once to get to the more recent ones).
Anyways, enjoy this video in which Amir tricks Streeter into going on a fake date.

Chris Brown and Rihanna

Dear people of the United States,

    Please stop talking about Chris Brown and Rihanna. I thought talking about it for a week was bad, but it's been almost an entire month now. There are decisions being made by our government that will literally effect the entire world!!! Instead, the only thing the media can manage to cover is an infinitesimal incident between two people.

    The only good thing that has come out of this insane coverage has likely been an increase in awareness for physical abuse towards women. It's an absolutely disgusting and unacceptable act (mostly by men) that is often not even reported by the victims for various reasons.

     However, although physical abuse is worthy of attention, there are also issues at hand today that have far reaching consequences and that can truly change the fate of the world. For example, recently, President Obama lifted the restrictions George Bush had placed on stem cell research. This is a monumental decision that will possibly give way to entirely new treatments for everything from cancer to broken limbs and possibly save or improve millions of lives.

    Instead, all we talk about is if it's right to listen to Chris Brown's songs anymore now that he (allegedly) beat Rihanna, or if it was right of her to go back to him after that. Decisions which will only effect 2 people who are only exploded because they are famous.

     So, please stop talking about Chris Brown and Rihanna. Thanks.

Sincerely,

Daniel Oria

You wanted cheaper macs? Your wish is Apple's command!

     Today, Apple not only made their desktop Macs cheaper, but they also made them more powerful!

     Their 20 inch iMac is $300 cheaper and comes with that spiffy new mini-display port. The 24 inch iMac (a.k.a. the beast) is also $300 cheaper and comes with more memory and hard drive space! Even the Mac Pro (a.k.a. the godzilla of computers) is more powerfull and is $300 less (are you seeing a pattern here?)

     The Mac Mini is the only desktop that doesn't get a price cut, however, it is much improved over the previous model from processor to graphics.

     You would also be wise to look in amazon.com and macmall.com for some small discounts on the previous models (cheaper than the new ones). So, go out there and stimulate the economy!!

I will sue you for reading this blog.

I'm kidding, obviously.

The point is, that people sue for anything nowadays. From slipping and falling in Wal Mart, being served too much alcohol, and your iphone not working right.

Usually, two things are happening here. In the case of the man suing for being "served too much alcohol" for example, these are people that are simply not taking responsibility for their own actions. Instead they prefer to blame it on some entity (preferably one with lots of money), who had nothing to do with what happened to them. The other case is when people simply want to take advantage of the legal system by filing fraudulent lawsuits to make a quick buck.

These kinds of things happen every single day. People wanting to simply make money are now dominating the legal system instead of people actually looking for real justice. Lawyers encourage people to make fraudulent lawsuits, and dishonest people end up getting money they never deserved.

Funny Ass Video of the Week (3)

Two high school students try to establish what is and isn't inappropriate for a school dance.

Hilarity ensues.

Enjoy.